Vanilla Twilight [AkuRoku]

Roxas hadn't realized how late it had gotten until he looked up at the night sky, filled with bright stars. The moon was full and luminous; it's dim light creating shadows around the graveyard. Everyone was long gone now, each giving their deepest sympathies. Though he did enjoy their company, he wanted to be alone…with him. Disregarding the fact he was in a jet black tux, he knelt down in the wet, fluffy snow, in front of Axel's grave and looked up at the starry sky. A few snowflakes landed on his tear-streaked face, letting out a heavy sigh. Axel was always so tough, Roxas was sure he'd survive. About a year ago, he was diagnosed with a rare disease. The doctors even said he barely had a chance. Nonetheless, Axel was still his cocky self that Roxas had fallen in love with. Every day Roxas would visit, he'd sit right next to him and lace his fingers with his; nuzzling his cheek into his neck, and talk until visiting hours ended.

"Roxas..."

His sky blue eyes snapped open suddenly, as if expecting someone to be in front of him. However, there was nobody there; just the cold, chilly air. For a second, the blonde could've sworn he felt that familiar presence. Warm lips against his, kissing him gently; the exact kiss that made his knees so weak, that he'd fall over if he wasn't holding him tight against his body. He could smell his scent of axe with a touch of a fresh fire burning.

"Axel?" Roxas called, snapping into reality and standing slowly to his feet, dusting the snow off his pant legs. No response. He sighed, and wiped his eyes, feeling more tears flow down his cheeks. Deciding it was late, he began to turn and walk back home, not daring to look behind him again. As he walked alone in the snow, he remembered how the news was broken to him…

~~~~~~~

"Roxas, where are you going?" His friend, Demyx, asked him skeptically, watching Roxas stop at the corner of the street and look over his shoulder.

"I'm going to visit Axel, you wanna go?" He asked. Demyx blinked, glancing away and staying silent at first. Just looking at Demyx's body language, Roxas could tell something was wrong and he turned around fully and slowly approached the musician.  

"Dem…what's wrong?" Roxas asked, his heart beating rapidly at fear of what grave news Demyx could have.

"Axel…" He began, looking Roxas in the eyes. "He didn't…he didn't make it…" He said slowly. Roxas's heart stopped; his eyes widened, and he could've sworn he could feel his heart breaking. Axel's…gone? Numbness spread throughout his body as he slowly covered his mouth in shock. He couldn't speak; for fear it would come out as a sob. He immediately wrapped his arms around Demyx and sobbed hard into his shoulder, and the taller blonde responded with soft, comforting words he really couldn't comprehend, since he was too busy thinking about what he'd do without him.

~~~~~~~~


Roxas walked up the stairs to his lonely apartment, wishing he took the offer to stay with Demyx for awhile. He walked into his room, slipping his tux off and left it on the floor, deciding he'd deal with it later. After he slipped into his pajamas, he flopped back on his bed and stared at the ceiling. He couldn't stop thinking about it; every time he closed his eyes, he'd see Axel. Sitting up slowly, he rubbed the back of his head and sighed sadly, running his fingers through his thick, blonde hair.

"Roxas…don't be sad…"

There it was again! That familiar presence, Roxas had grown so used to. It sent chills down his spine and made him shiver as he hugged himself tightly.

"C'mon, Roxas, cheer up…"

"Axel?" He called out again, standing up, rubbing his eyes. He's been so tired, due to not sleeping for a few days. Demyx had pleaded he get some sleep and try to relax, but it was so hard for him. Ever since…he left…

"Don't cry anymore…"

Roxas made a beeline for the bathroom, putting both hands on the sink, staring into the mirror. He saw his own reflection; his eyes red and puffy from crying, his cheeks still damp from his tears, and his blonde hair slightly tousled.

"Axel…are you there?" He asked, but knew he really wasn't. It was impossible…he was gone, wasn't he? Suddenly, the image reflected back in the mirror altered. Now, instead of his own image, he saw Axel reflected back, with a cocky smile, his head tilted. Roxas reached his hand out slowly, his eyes widened slightly. His fingertips touched the glass, but instead of seeing his reflection touch the glass, he saw Axel's hand move as well. A single tear slid down his cheek; it felt so real…as if Axel was still here and alive.

"Hey, what did I say about crying?"

Their hands were still held out; Axel's emerald eyes staring back into Roxas's ocean blue ones. He blinked hard; feeling like this was just some kind of dream. Axel was gone, and his own reflection was back in the mirror. He hung his head, holding either side of the sink.

"I miss you so much…" He whispered under his breath, turning away from the mirror, walking back into his room. He carefully lied down on his side, curling up, staring outside his bedroom window. The drapes were opened just slightly, so he could see outside. Snowflakes danced and floated to the ground gently, just like before. Roxas half smiled, remembering the first snowfall of the year with Axel…it had snowed just like this too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~


"Yo, Roxas," Axel called from out in the living room. Roxas grumbled, and glanced over at the alarm clock, sitting up, shivering at the cold morning air.

"Axel, it's 8 o'clock in the morning, what's going on?" He asked, in an unamused tone, flopping back on the bed, pulling the covers over his head. Suddenly, they were ripped off, and he shivered once again at the cool air hitting his skin.

"It snowed last night! C'mon, we're going outside." Axel declared, practically pulling Roxas out of bed. He grumbled in response, but followed the redhead anyway; he was stronger, after all. He threw miscellaneous snow-appropriate clothes such as a jacket, scarf, hat and gloves. Axel was fully dressed in his snow apparel and was currently waiting for Roxas to put on his.

"Alright, alright…" Roxas sighed, stifling a laugh as he slid on his jacket, jeans, scarf, gloves and hat, following Axel outside into the cold. He blinked, looking around the beautiful winter wonderland.

"Hey!" Axel yelled. Roxas turned his head in confusion in his direction, only to be pelted with a snowball on the side of his face. The redhead broke out in laughter, holding his side. "Oh, I totally got you there! Oh, Roxas, you're so gullible."

"Oh, yeah?" Roxas laughed in amusement, wiping the snow off the side of his face, bending down to make a snowball. He threw it at Axel, who ducked and started laughing again. He lost his balance and slipped, falling backwards into the snow. Now it was Roxas's turn to laugh, as he ran over to the man, skidding through the snow on his knees next to him, hovering over him.

"That wasn't fair…" Axel said in defeat.

"It was perfectly fair!" Roxas argued, laughing as he leaned forward, pecking the redhead on the lips. "I love you…" He whispered, lacing his hands with Axel's

"I love you too, Roxas."

~~~~~~~~~~~~


Roxas sighed, staring at his hands, wishing he could relive that memory again. It was about a month before he was diagnosed with his disease. A pain tugged at his heart, as he stared at his hands, wishing he was here; both their hands laced together, Roxas snuggling into the man's comforting arms. It just wasn't the same anymore. Ever since Axel died, everything seemed to fall apart. He was always thinking about him, constantly. Roxas wanted him back so bad. So bad, that it made him hurt even worse.

"Axel…I miss you so much. You don't even know…" He whispered quietly to himself.

"I do know, Roxas. I'm always here."

There it was again. That same presence he felt at the graveyard. He lifted his head and looked around his room, but saw nobody else. It was so strange.

"I'm here, Roxas. I'll always be with you. You may not be able to see me, but I'll always be here."

Roxas closed his eyes slowly, imagining Axel was there next to him, his arms wrapped around his waist and his chin resting on his shoulder. The more he thought about it, the more relaxed he felt.

"I swear…I won't forget you…I love you…" He whispered, and before long, he was sound asleep, his breathing slowing to a steady pace.

"I love you too, Roxas." Axel whispered, leaning over Roxas's bedside, kissing him on the nose. Although, his body went straight through, his nose gave a little twitch. He chuckled, walking over to the other side of the bed and let himself float over it, wrapping his arms around Roxas, just like old times. Although, it still went straight through, Axel knew Roxas could feel him there, based on the slight mumble of his name as the blonde turned in the direction of his astral form. Yes, he would be alright. It may take a while, but with Axel here to watch over him, Roxas would be up and living life in no time. Axel would make sure of it.

And I'll forget the world that I knew, but I swear I won't forget you.